Monday, May 19, 2008

I sent the Bitch Packing......

It was love at first sight.
The right stance,deep black and all the right parts.
6 years back I traded a perfectly fine 34 3 window for a nice tight 30 a coupe.
Mind you.. she had ALL the right lingo,specially the baby hemispherical.
I was overcome with her lust.I would caress and talk to her every night.
But it was a one sided love affair.
At every turn she would laugh and ridicule me. For the good part of 5 years I lavished her with praise and luscious gifts.I thought I could buy her love.
I was wrong,...... dead wrong.
In the beginning I overlooked here small shortcomings.......
Never have I EVER had one give me so much grief.
Fuel problems...carb problems,I began to replace each and every ornery part with fresh speed parts...... still she mocked at me at every turn. Frustration at every turn of the wheel.
At this point I think I named her the Black Mariah.
The tranny was replaced.. rear suspension.... poor wiring...rad and coolant leaks.
It never ended. She started to act like Christine's younger and immature sister.
The more I tried, the less love I got.
It was like a high school girl friend that did the whole football team, but would let me get to first base.
Finally I had enuff..... my scorned  love turned to hate.
The final straw was when she threw her crank,spit out her bearing and blew the block ......she let me no alternative.

Make fun of me huh?......
I parted the bitch out and sent her down the road.
Sold the body and frame to a guy... wishing him good luck.
I then sold off the remaining drive line parts to others,... at flea markets and swap meets,secretly laffing like a fiend in some dark corner.
I deconstructed her and bid her farewell......

I got the last laff..... I now date her older,prettier sister.....
...a 32 5 window.

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